The list of things I respect about my mother is virtually endless. But two of the greatest gifts she gave me were those of an education and open mind. I grew up in Mississippi, which I truly do not associate with understanding or open-mindedness. It’s one of the reasons I ran like hell from there when I was 18 and haven’t been back since 2000. I found the religion stifling and the racism appalling. I’ve been gone a long time and I never want to go back. But I digress.
From an early age, my mother took me to Sunday school and for years I willingly attended a Methodist church. But when my interests waned and my mother’s curiosity waxed, we began to explore different religions from Southern Baptism to the Mormon Church. We attended services, hung out with families, and spent a lot of time discussing what we believed.
When I was in high school, I started attending a Southern Baptist church and going to Young Life on Wednesday mornings at 6:30 am. But somewhere along the way, I realized I wasn’t truly invested in what these groups believed. Certainly, I believed there was something bigger than us, but I had no idea what or who that was. And when I moved away to college and started discussing my feelings with others, I quickly earned the label “agnostic.”
It amazes me that people are so misinformed in 2011. Many times when I’m asked about my religious beliefs and state that I’m agnostic, people ask what I have against God and why I have devoted my life to hating him. Such statements and questions shock me every time. So I just want to be clear: It’s not that I don’t believe in a God or that I hate him. I just don’t know who or what he/she is. It doesn’t make me a heathen and it certainly doesn’t make me ignorant. In fact, I know more about many religions than the average Joe.
Additionally, being agnostic does not mean that I refuse to teach my children about religion. Teague has been able to recite the Lord’s Prayer and the 23rd Psalm since he was 4 and knows more about the Old Testament than he does nursery rhymes. As a toddler, I gave him the option to pick out a book at Barnes and Noble and he chose the illustrated Beginner’s Bible. Other than horse books, these are his favorite bedtime stories. And I present them as precisely that: Stories.
If he decides one day that they are his stories and he wants to live his life for God, then so be it. I will accept him as I always have. But if he decides that he doesn’t know what’s out there and would rather be agnostic, at least I will know I have done my job in educating him and that he has made an informed choice. Over the next few years, my kids will be introduced to Judaism, Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity, and everything in between. If they decide to listen to the Grateful Dead and worship peace, I will support it. My job is to give them options. Present them with all possibilities. And trust them to make an informed decision. And I’m ready to accept whatever that might be. With a little help from Xanax.
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