You have arrived at five.

Tonight will be the very last time I snuggle up to my 4-year-old Bug.  In a few hours, my adorable, blond bambino will be 5.  And he says he will no longer be my baby.

That's right.  In an hour, he will be a big boy.  So thank god we are in California and I technically have 4 more hours of babyhood due to a time technicality.

Crews Cullin Hendrickson entered this world on March 30th, 2009 around 7 am.  He weighed
6lbs. 9 oz. and was 20 inches long.  That morning, he made Teague a big brother.  And that day, he made my life complete.

Crews is one of those kids you just can't help but adore.  He is gorgeous, with his big blue eyes and ridiculously long lashes.  He has the sweetest, kindest smile and the most infectious giggle.  His blondness is insane, considering both of his parents sport dark brown locks, and he always has the coolest hairstyle even though it's not really intended. 

He is so incredibly kind and thoughtful, and I hear that from others at least once a day.  He asks for things nicely.  He always says thank you.  He knows when you need a hug, or maybe only want one.  He puts up with his brother's constant abuse yet still thinks Teague hung the moon.  And he deals with my impatience by simply saying, "OK, Mom!"

Yes, I have a good one in Crews.  He makes my life so much sweeter.  In fact, I think he makes the world a better place.

Crews, I can't wait to see what you become.  You are the kind of person we should all strive to be.  I wish I was 1/100th as brave as you, and I admire your relentless faith in those around you.

You will always be my "Bug."  My "Buggle."  My "Boss."  My "Blondilocks."  My "Little Blond Bambino."  And my "Kitten."

Here's to your 5th Birthday!  And Thank You for humoring me and taking the following pics with "The 5" yesterday!

 

My neighbor is an a**hole.

So maybe once or twice before I have dedicated an entire blog to a complete jerk.  I usually try to keep it positive, or at least funny when the topic is a little heavy, but there is nothing funny about my neighbor.  He is an a**hole.

You might remember that back in October my dad decided to build Teague a treehouse for his 8th birthday.  The boys were so excited and watched every single bolt and board be put into place.  It was frickin' awesome!

 



But on the final day of the build, my a**hole neighbor (who had watched the entire construction process for over a week) approached my dad and said "the structure" was too close to his property and had to be removed.  Now, my dad was very cordial.  And since I have always had a great relationship with my neighbor, I had no qualms about heading over to talk to him.  I thought surely a treehouse would not be a big deal, and he would tell us it was fine.  But, no.  That's not what happened at all.

Instead, he told me about a lawsuit he filed back in the 80's when the cable company came on his property and ran a cable under a part of his yard without his permission.  Apparently, there was no easement and he was pissed.  So he filed a lawsuit that drug on for years.  He just wouldn't let it go.  Finally, the cable company got so tired of fighting it that they gave up and gave him free cable for life.  Yup.  He hasn't paid for cable since the 80's.  And this was his way of letting me know he would fight me too.

The next time my dad came in town, he removed the entire right-hand side of the treehouse so that it was the "required three feet" from the jerk's fence.  It took almost as long to tear half of it down as it did to build it.  After all, it had to be safe. 

The treehouse just wasn't the same, but at least we got to keep it.  And I haven't heard a word from the a**hole in months.

But fast-forward to Tuesday and I get a knock on my front door.  It's the Code and Safety Officer from the Town of James Island.  He stopped by to let me know that my neighbor has not only filed an official complaint, but that if I don't remove my treehouse within 14 days, that I will be cited and my neighbor is filling a lawsuit.

I get this handed to me:

And then I'm told he will help me tear it down since I don't have a husband to do it.

Seriously.

Today I got this in the mail:

 

 

Note: the pictures are taken from the a**hole neighbor's yard.

So, since I am leaving town tomorrow and there is nothing I can do about the treehouse situation, I decided to let my neighbor know how I feel by placing a sign on my treehouse while I'm gone. 

 

 

And I made sure my sign was not within 3 feet of his yard.

It's a good thing I love you...

As I stand in the kitchen holding a bottle of wine and unable to locate the corkscrew, I wish I had a Samurai sword.  That's right.  A Samurai sword.  I've seen people open champagne bottles with swords and right now I would try just about anything to get this bottle open.  You see, the last few hours have been an absolute nightmare.  So perhaps having a sword around is not such a good idea. Because I probably would have impaled myself by now.

We've all had this thought about our kids: It's a good thing I love you because I really don't like you very much right now.  Right?  Right?!

Or maybe I'm just a horrible person.  Or a terrible mother.  Or maybe your kids are still small and they haven't yet made you want to strangle them.  Or your kids are perfect or whatever.

But mine are not. 

Yes, they are cute, and kind, and smart, and fun, but they are also testy, challenging, nasty little back-talkers at times.  Especially the big one.  And when one of them gets going, the other LOVES to feed right into it. 

It happens.  I get it.  But tonight was a battle of epic proportions between Teague and I.

It all started with homework.  Well, homework is almost always what starts our battles.  Every once in awhile we get away with a tear-free, no-yelling night of spelling words and timed tests, but there is typically some degree of tension.  Teague doesn't want to sit still and can't focus for more than 30 seconds (thank you, ADHD) and he genuinely has a difficult time doing the work in an effective way (thank you, orthographic dyslexia).  And I can't stand to be stuck at the table for 2 hours only to have to come back after getting Crews to bed and sit there some more.  Not to mention, I just don't understand how you can NOT get things done in a timely manner (thank you, Type A personality).

Let's face it: Neither one of us is at our best during homework time.  But tonight, after two hours of telling him to get back to the table, finding he had spent 10 minutes drawing on himself with a permanent green marker, seeing he scribbled out the comments I made to his teacher in his planner, and having him tell me I am awful because he never gets to do what he wants to do (Here, I would like to point out that we went to Jim N' Nicks, River Street Sweets, and the Aquarium today after school, which were all his choices), I was on the verge of tears.

And to be honest, at that moment, I really didn't like him very much.  Now technically, I know it was his behavior I didn't like, but I was so frustrated that in the moment I couldn't make the distinction.  And of course, I didn't tell him I didn't like him, but I sure did think it.  A lot.  Like maybe a couple hundred times.

In the end, he was responsible for scrubbing his green skin.  He did not finish his homework.  And he got served with early bedtime. 

I got elevated blood pressure and a missing corkscrew.

So it's a good thing I love that kiddo more than anything in the whole world.  Because if I had THAT thought THAT many times about anyone else, they would be history.  And I guess I should be thankful we only have Nerf swords...