It's hard out here for a... ?

These days I'm really struggling with who I am. 
I know first and foremost I'm a mom. 
A friend. 
A daughter. 
A separated person who just can't seem to get divorced...And this is primarily where the problem lies.

I can't be myself.
I can't say what I want.
I can't do what I please.
I just can't be me.

Tonight, my friend Jodi Barker came over to deliver her self-proclaimed, "BEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER!"

I have to say I've been extremely curious about this gift for a few weeks.

I have pondered what could warrant such a label.

I have lamented over what could bring me such joy.

And now that I have it in my hands, I have to say: IT RULES!

Jodi turned my blog into a book!

From my very first post...

To the day the game changed...

To when I learned things were different...

And that this chapter was coming to a close.

From old summertime rituals...

To new concepts of family...

My tears, and fears, and thoughts, and loves.  My dislikes and strengths.  My big gains and ultimate losses.  Questions and answers.  Everything that's important to me.

It's all here. In my own words. In print and beautifully bound.


My dear, sweet, hilarious, Jodi:

Thank you for presenting me with this.

Thank you for showing me who I am and what I'm made of.

Thanks for reminding me that somewhere underneath this curly-haired mess, I'm still filled with sleek awesomeness!  :)

And thanks for reminding me that I absolutely adore writing.

PS I really hope we get to do this trip one day...

And that you learn to photoshop.  :)